EDITORIAL

TEXTS

For You, Lord, it's never too late. Glory be to You, the Founder of the centuries! Time is your Quintessence! Glory be to You, the Supreme Wisdom, Who measures the depths of our conscience with discriminating tolerance!

Oh, how much I love You, dear God. How much I admire You! You provide everything! Your foresee everything! You see all, because You are the Light. You never leave mankind abandoned or wanting. Even when a dry tree collapses by the sharp axe of death, new sprouts will bloom around that ancient wood.  I am beginning to notice this all around me.

I, who for so many years have been the protector of some sorrowful persons in this far corner of my village, I know that soon great tribulations will start for me. Shortly, I know I will either have left this earth, or, I will just be a poor old man without vigor nor energy, with a troubled imagination regarding the memories of the past and the presentiments of the future.

I will once again be a child and as in my early years, I will look for the rays of the sun, because I have always felt that seeing myself covered by its light, I was much closer to God. Oh, the sunlight! How beautiful it is!

I desire death but yet fear it, because looking about me I see so many men dominated by the insanity of temptation, and I feel that my advice is still needed here. I prayed and asked God, for someone who could replace me, who could continue my work in my dear little parish and since God grants what one asks for, when it is for humanity’s progress, God sent Maria. She is a ministering angel of the village, a extraordinary woman who by her special aptitudes, has been called upon as if to regenerate a planet...!

Thank you, God! I can leave this earth now, as she will take my place! She, who is full of life, youth, and love!  Now, I will not feel so selfish, if at times, I desire a quicker parting from this earth. It has been such a long time since I have seen the girl with the black curls!

Forgive me Lord, if I think only of myself, even though I know my life is in Your Hands! I still have much to do here on earth. Rudolph still needs me. He has a sickness of the soul which is taking possession of him, consuming his spirit and inaction is dissipating his body. My poor son! Yes, he is my son, for I'm sure that he has carried my name and I've rocked his cradle. How horrible it is to be evil! I feel so sorry for him. He is now more aware, and recognizes he has not truly lived, so now he thirsts for life. How unfortunate!

Just last night, how he lamented while speaking with Maria, about the loneliness of his existence. And how well she consoled him!  He loves her, he feels for Maria a love unknown to him. He does not see her as a woman, but as a mother; he admires her like we all do, and he seems to calm down when he speaks with her. At other times, he becomes afraid when it appears to him, she speaks as if he is listening to a terrible prophesy. How inspired she was last night! Without a doubt, she served as an intermediary for superior spirits because something resplendent surrounded her and she would get that brilliance in her eyes and that prophetic tone in her voice. Everything inclines me to believe that the spirits of God communicate through her. What eloquence! What sentiment and what conviction she had!

I enjoy hearing her speak, and last night in particular she was really inspired. Rudolph arrived before she did, and had sat down looking somber and meditative. I sat next to him and asked, “What is it? I find you more sad than usual.”

“Do not say I'm sad. What I am is desperate,” he responded.

“Has something new happened?” 

“Nothing new, everything is old with me. It's that I cannot bear the enormous weight of this life. If it were not for that restraining influence you have over me, I would return to Court, and go from intrigue to intrigue, and from crime to crime. At least I would be living, because here I do not live,” he said.

“You do not live because you do not wish too!”  I said.

“You say that it's because I do not wish it, well what do you want me to do, if everywhere I go I feel terrible? The only thing that dissipates the clouds which darken my mind and makes me feel better is the daughter of Luisa. When that child smiles and speaks with me, then I feel like I'm not on this accursed world. But then, all of a sudden I remember, and think of her mother and that Louisa is another man’s child, the same child that I love so much, one who is a product of his love. Envy then creeps into my soul. I feel that although he is a pauper and in spite of his poverty, he is happier than me, because at least he is loved!”

“Without a doubt he is more fortunate than you,” I said.

“And with that belief, after comprehending that I am cursed by God, how can I live? It was  stupid, stupid of me to have listened to you. But it is not too late, and I believe I will go back to Court because the contemplative life is great for saints, Father Germain, like you for example, because you can look back on your past without feeling ashamed. But for wrongdoers like me, we make no time for meditation.”

“Those like you are the ones who have more need of meditation!” exclaimed Maria, who had heard the last few words of Rudolph. 

He, upon hearing her voice trembled, and the embarrassment of shame caused his face to redden. Trying to smile, he let go with haste, the hand that Maria had extended towards his with an outpouring of emotion, and looking at him with that magnetizing look, she said sweetly, “Ungrateful!”

He looked at her attentively, a look that seems to tell a story, a look that seems to ask for all in the world, and she, while placing her hands on his brow, told him with maternal tenderness, “Be calm, you poor troubled one.”

Rudolph, docile like a child, expanded his chest then exhaled a deep breath, and got up. He  came near me, and said smiling, “Do not worry, Father. I will not leave you, but, there are moments...”

“Why do you seem to get so crazy?” asked Maria, sitting next to me, “Because only a crazy person declares that God has cursed him.” 

“If I'm not cursed, at the least I must be forgotten by Him,” replied Rudolph with impatience, “Because in my life there has been nothing but calamities. That's why living scares me and death terrorizes me, because if there is something after..... I'm sure to have a rough time of it!”

“If there is something after?”asked Maria.“That there is ‘nothing’ after, is not true. But Rudolph, what awaits us is... everything. This existence that you are going through is but a millionth of a second on the clock of eternity.”

“You say the same things as Father Germain. I want to... I want to believe you both....But, at times ...  I confess, I think that both of you are delirious.”

“Listen to me,” said Maria,”Do you recognize in Father Germain a superior morality over yours?”

“Of course, I do. How could I not?”

“And why is this? Both of you were born the same way, and both of you went through infancy and childhood, and both of you have become adults. Why is it then, that he has been able to rein in his passions, while you have been dominated by them and, they have plunged you into degradation? Why is it that since a child, for him it was the light, while you since birth, have been in the shadows?  Is there not something our reason tells us regarding these notable differences? Can we denounce that there has not been a previous life? Does not all this indicate a life which has been lived before, which continues now today, and will continue again sometime in the future? Do you think that the existence of a man is reduced only to a few years of insanity and after a brief period, there comes obscurity and nothingness, or, a final justice and the ultimate judgement without hope? Do you not see this is impossible...?”

“Impossible, you say?” asked Rudolph.“ What do I know....? But it is certain, that those who die, do not return.” Upon saying this, a violent shock jarred his whole being, he cowered, and he looked at us as if saying with his lips ‘keep silent.’ Appearing terrorized,  he seemed to be listening to something, but only he could hear it. He then got up and started running around in all directions as if he was fleeing from something. Maria and I were finally able to stop him and calm him down.

I made him sit down, placed his head on my chest, and Maria got in front of him and said,“Rudolph! Rudolph! What's wrong? Come back to us.”

“The dead do return....What horror!” Rudolph exclaimed out of breath and then he embraced me like he was fleeing from a phantom.

Maria placed her hands on his forehead, and it appeared to me that coming from her finger tips were luminous rays, giving off particles of light. My poor son started calming down, little by little, finally with a meek voice he said, “Do not abandon me! I'm wretched!”

“How could I abandon you?” I asked him, “you know full well that I love you with all my soul. I have also told you that if I were able to enter heaven, I would not enter unless you could enter with me! Even if waiting there, was the pale girl with the black curls. Although she is my love, you are my obligation. Listen to me, Rudolph, listen well to what I am going to tell you.  Look at me attentively and engrave in your memory my image.  Do you see me?”

During these instants I'm sure that within my eyes there comes forth a remarkable and brilliant fire, because I feel as if my blood is burning within my veins, my ideas acquire lucidity, and when I look out into space, I see the earth. “Look,” a voice tells me, and I detect that a few centuries in time have passed by.

I then tell Rudolph, “I see a new chapter, a new future life. I see you young and vigorous, dressed in the humble clothes of a laborer, you smile but with a sadness, and vaguely you think of me. That is not strange because I am very close to you. I'm not dressed in the clergy’s habit that I wear now, no, what covers me is a white tunic. I do not abandon you, not for an instant; I'm always near you. I am your guardian spirit. I talk to you, I inspire you by my will power, I send you nourishment.  I work for your progress, I infiltrate your thoughts with my own, within your being, also lives my soul. You live unconsciously ingrained with the memory of me within you. This is happening after many centuries have passed. You see, my son, I will be with you for many centuries. How can you think that I can abandon you now? Tell me, what have you seen, to make you act so desperately?”

“He has seen his son,”said Maria.“I also have seen him. Is this not true, Rudolph?”

“Yes, it is true,” he said, “Yes, but I wish it had been him only....him alone. But I also saw my father, and Berta, and also Elisea....and her husband. I have also heard that terrible laugh so near me... so loud, that it still resounds within my ears.”

“Calm down,” said Maria,“Be reasonable, you are upsetting yourself unnecessarily. It is true you are a criminal, but do not add to your disgrace by being ungrateful. You say that you're not loved, and that those like you are cursed by God. How ungrateful! What about the immense love that Father Germain has for you? And what about my faithful fondness for you? Does this not satisfy you either? Tell me!”

“Does it satisfy me, you ask? No, it does not satisfy me, because I love you. You are the first woman that I've looked upon with a religious respect. I feel for you what I think I should have felt for my mother, but at the same time, I wish that you would love me.....  in another way. I do not know how to explain myself, of what I want from you, I'm ashamed of myself, and ......”

“I understand what you're feeling,” said Maria, with a melancholy voice. “You have confused the pure affections of the soul with the base desires of the material body. But you do not know any better for you have not tasted the pure waters of spirituality, but have suckled only on the bitterness of materialism. You still do not know the multiple sensations of life. You have  bound everything within sexuality; but the carnal appetite of the body is an agent of nature with a limited purpose. The greater work is what is done by the spirit, and that's the task that I wish for you to start. I want you to love, yes, but for you to be satisfied with a love which purifies all it comes into contact with. God, Who is so Great, so Good, and so Just, He knows that you have been a wrongdoer for centuries. You have been as a rock which has fallen from the highest mountain and has been rolling, and rolling, without ever finding the bottom. God does not want you to continue in your evil ways eternally, because you have been using your will wrongfully and consistently, always falling into the abyss. Now, God has placed two barriers in your way to stop this fall, persons by your side who have struggled much, Father Germain and I. We are two spirits who already know what it's like to have fallen, how to die, and how to redeem ourselves. We also have fallen like yourself, and we also have died feeling remorseful because of our past actions, and we have also lived alone.... If you do not believe me, reflect, even still we live alone....entirely and intimately alone. We live for helping others, without a shred of life for ourselves. Do you know why?  It is because, without doubt, even still we are not worthy of being happy.”

“Well, if you both are not worthy of happiness, what do I deserve?” asked Rudolph sounding discouraged.

“Today you deserve compassion, tomorrow you will suffer the punishments you are deserving of. You will cry because you have caused others to cry. You will have hunger because the bread that your dogs did not even want, many times you did not give to your poor servants who were starving. You will burn of thirst because the water you had for your horses, you did not permit weary travelers to drink. You will be without a home because you have taken pleasure in  removing the poor from their homes and have denied help to the sick and destitute. You will be humbled because you have subjected towns to your tyranny. You will be deceived because you have betrayed many. During many, many centuries it will appear to you that you will be as if you have been disinherited by all Creation, but it is your crimes which have pronounced this excommunication.”
 
Maria continued, “But, since the life of spirits has a beginning and a purpose, and since you have not lived an eternity following God’s Laws, the payment of your debts will be fulfilled, and during that time your spirit guide will not abandon you. Like all protecting spirits, they will give you solace, and during this time hopefully you will not be committing anymore crimes, you will only be paying the consequences of your past actions, more or less patiently and with resignation, and not adding to your problems. Then the one day will come, a long way from now, when you will be so tired of so much suffering and so much struggle, that your soul will feel exhausted. You will repose, and organize your memories, and you will realize that you had lived before, and you will comprehend that you will live again in the future.”

“You will then ardently exclaim, ‘Dear God! Dear Lord! God All-Powerful! Destiny, have me be whatever you want me to be! Yes, I've lived before, I live now, and yes, I will live in the future! I desire to be noble and  good! I want to be a light of Truth and of Reason! I have quenched my thirst with heinous slime, now I crave the pure water of Life! My soul feels very cold! I want to cover myself with the warmth of Love!’ Then, since God gives one hundred to one [all the time we need], He answers those who call Him, He answers those who ask for Him,
He helps those who seek Him.”

“Then Rudolph, then Creation will show its blessings to you! Then you will be an honorable man, and a smiling woman will be waiting for you at your home. Your children will call to you, ‘Father, come to us because without you, what would we do!’ Also, you will have friends who will honor you with their affection. And when it is time for you to leave the earth again, you will have a grieving family who will pray by your tomb.”

“You will feel a pleasure so immense upon contemplating your first existence of regeneration, that you will return again to earth with double the ardor, you will not only want to be good, but you will want to be great. You will dream of being one of the great men of science in future generations. And you will be one, because for a man to become a redeemer of humanity, he does not need anything more than the power of his will. Therefore Rudolph, have hope, cheer up,  do not look down upon the earth, look up because your future is written in the heavens.”

When Maria speaks like this, she is completely transfigured; her big eyes were brilliant with the sacred fire of inspiration, she looked as a prophetess of past ages, who extract secrets out of  infinity.

Rudolph felt the benefits of her influence, he looked at her with ecstasy and finally said, with much noble elation, “Blessed may you be, Maria. Bless you! Your words resound within my heart and they reanimate my being. I do not care about suffering if there will also be time for my regeneration. I thought that all was lost. I believed that for me, it was too late and that feeling was killing me.”

“No, Rudolph. Only man measures by earthly time, God measures by Eternity. For the Creator there is no yesterday, or tomorrow. HIS DAY is Eternal, for Him THE PRESENT has no beginning, nor end. For Him, there is no day or night; the sun of Progress has always shined upon the zenith of Eternity,”said Maria.

Rudolph, upon hearing such consoling affirmations, smiled and joyfully exclaimed, “What can I do to start with my work?”

“Look,” said Maria, “An idea just came to me. Recently, a poor needy woman, fatigued with exhaustion, arrived in our village, and from the looks of her, poor thing, she will soon be leaving this earth. But she has three small children and what will happen to them, unless some charity assist them? Let's build a home for the orphans of the poor. I believe that the smallest of your jewels, the most simple broach of your cape, will surely be worth much more than we'll need to buy a building for our needs. Help me in this work, Rudolph, let’s build a building, one that will be full of happiness and where the children will be able to smile.”

“Yes, you can count on me,” said Rudolph,“I will help you with my riches. I will do whatever you desire because it's like you said, I feel cold within my soul, and I wish to warm it with a mantle of Divine Love.”

What a wonderful night! I will never forget it! When I was left alone, even still I could hear the prophetic words of Maria, and Rudolph’s voice, resounding in my ears, then a feeling of well-being came over me.

It's true, for God, it's never too late. Praise the Lord, Founder of the centuries! Praise your  Supreme Wisdom! All before You, are small! Only You are Great!

Time is Your glorification, because with time and work, mankind can obtain his rehabilitation!  For You, it's never too late! Blessed be Time, Dear God, because Time is Your Essence!